MY STEPS UP FROM THAT SANDTRAP SLUMP

This is probably by far the most honest blog post I might be putting out so far but I’m happy to be back on my keys again.  It did just occur to me, why do I have wait to be in a completely better place before actually getting back to you guys?  I’ve finally managed to scribble this reminder onto my brain — I don’t need to become better before having something valuable to say.  Not everything in my life needs to be picture perfect for me to share what’s close to my heart with you.  Besides, my experience of deciding to kick the bucket and get up and make an opportunity for myself may or may not help some of you out there.  God’s grace and blessings have been revealed in the most unexpected ways for me…however He just might be waiting for you to take the first step and get up.

maxresdefault
Winona Ryder, Reality Bites 1994

The FOMO (Fear-Of-Missing-Out) during my freelancer blues while looking left and right at every other freelancer or influencer was paralyzing me and actually making me miss out and get stuck.  My mistake was I looked beyond MY lane.  Suddenly everyone was posing and posting non-stop about anything and everything and where they were at.  I had never hit a WALL like this and it was new to me.   Read on for the full post and see the steps I took to reach higher ground.


To full post & COMMENTS...

DROPPING A LINE WITH PIZZA AND I’M FINE

Hello, all of you, I know it’s been like two weeks.  In a very gradual, slightly reluctant way I decided to take a break from blogging not because something happened or anything like that but because real life concerns were at hand.  I just had to take a break from all of it and get me pretty bum back on some work.  On this end, all the online media was just overtaking my brain, pressure to keep up with all this “influencing” and even some “insincerely influential” stuff was rising in a not so healthy way inside me.  It was affecting how I planned to produce posts, and take photos…some of you who blog know this feeling.  Today everyone wants something from talking about something or showing off something.  That’s real life and you need to ride the wave to stay in this.  It wasn’t like that for me when I began this blog before so I just managed to paddle back up to the surface for a quick breath.  Blogging burnout is a bummer, but I just needed to take a lengthy refresh…and perhaps have some pizza from Caruso on hand-painted Italian crockery.

Processed with VSCO with h3 preset

There was also a highly unpleasant situation where due to unfortunate circumstances we didn’t have power in our rented apartment for two weeks.  Lately, I have been living though without wondering what products I just needed to slap on my face because of some important things that needed my attention…and while it was completely important to get back to loving all that good stuff  it was beginning to feel redundant.  I just hit the reset button for all of it to feel new again.  So here, peace and pizza to you and yes, you still got me!  The blog’s here to stay.… To full post & COMMENTS...

A REAL LIFE RAMBLE

Currently, yes I have started editing my vlog on my first full facial, stay alert for that one.  I know I won’t produce a proper edit if I force finish it before midnight so I must as well just…talk to you guys.  When was blogging anything more than sending your own shiny thought bubble out into the world?  Or perhaps, a place to let out some emo steam.  I remember vaguely when I last felt the way I feel now which is utterly pressured and just a tad bit discouraged about somethings but not entirely, this is not related to blogging but more on some real life things I need to get done other than the blogging, hence this short hiatus (short only because of delays).

308841_10150321635896767_1352603840_n

UP FINE ARTS BLOCK BATCHMATES AND BEYOND: Dan Matutina (Twisted Fork), Me (Bless My Bag) Marielle Nadal (Craft MNL), Bernice De Leon Yumul (Plus63)

Back then I was a senior in university (blockmates above reunited about 4 years ago), I was on the university wide student council, and in the running for honors (but barely).  It didn’t help either that year that my general ed subjects sometimes felt just as taxing as my majors and that I contracted dengue fever in the first semester of thesis.  There were certain days that felt like things were going to tumble down on me the next morning (sheer number of things to do and classes etc) and at a wee hour in the morning I’d glance at the clock while being not yet done and sometimes I felt sort of in a bind.  The things I needed to get done were in venues so far away from each other I had to plan my life around that.  Anyway today I need to stop looking at all these to dos as a web and need to focus on snapping each tiny strand.  I’ll get through this, I’ll get every single thing done.  Oh, April, I’m so not ready for you with all these tickboxes still not ticked, but will endeavor to be and I shall overcome.  Oh, and you’re welcome for the emo steam.… To full post & COMMENTS...

In the inmost part…

I’ve been having bouts of interrupted sleep and waking up at this way too early hour of about 3am.  Yesterday it was understandable, because the other night I made the mistake of taking an early nap at 6pm I then woke up at 9 or 10pm and that was not a good idea.  

I didn’t expect that I’d wake up at this hour again, because I went to bed this time at about…10pm.  Restless, once again, in the inmost part.… To full post & COMMENTS...